The Living Cells of a Sheep Foetus Injection!
Written by Julen Madariaga on March 29th, 2010Of all the amazing things that happen to me in China, the SMS messages I get in my cell phone are one of them.
When I first got to Shanghai 3 years ago I was young and my heart was full of ambition. Eager to make a name for myself in the local business circles, I handed out my name card liberally to all those smiling locals that pullulated in the networking events, actively introducing themselves and offering their cards in the lovely Asian two-handed fashion.
It took me a few weeks to understand how things work in Shanghai, and by then my card had already become a commodity in the IDs market, classified right up there under the header: First Class Expat Suckers.
The downside of this is that a good 75% of the text messages I receive since then are adverts. The good side is that these adverts are among the most extraordinary that I have ever seen, giving a good insight of the resourcefulness and creativity of the Shanghai underworld.
The messages include special cards to spy on someone’s conversations, loving daughters I never knew I had, or innovative credit at advantageous rates of only 3-figures percent, right in the middle of the financial crisis. For a while I have given up reading them, as I considered I had already seen all there was to see. But recent evidence reveals that this field of research is far from exhausted. See the last message:
Go to Switzerland to enjoy the Living Cells of a (Sheep) Foetus Injection treatment, totally repairs the decaying organism. During the whole process a translator will look after you. This will make you rejuvenate, your youth will glow again in a totally new life experience. Telephone:X.
Like usual, excuse the inaccuracies. It would be easier if I chose originals that made more sense, but I like translating dangerously. The main problem here is with the character 羊, which is a sheep, but in words like 羊水, it just means amniotic fluid. That is why sheep is in parenthesis, indicating that the expression 羊胎素 might actually refer to a normal (human) foetus. Just how much more disgusting can this get.
Working Questions: What exactly are these guys selling? Is it just a scam, or do they really have a place in Switzerland for old Chinese who are rolling in it? Anyone tried the Living Cells of a Sheep Foetus Injection? If I try it, won’t my bodily hair grow white and fluffy like a little lamb?
Like usual, CNY readers are invited to call the number and test the treatment at your own risk and peril, post results in comments below.
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Five reasons to use one such product, and a related Chinese dealer. Basically, it’s a cure-all….
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Joel, you are fast, I have only just pressed the publish button! Now we know the secret of your fresh and ever-young smile, envied by all the other China bloggers…
I am glad that you solved the “sheep” mistery. That was really tricky to translate because even my Chinese friend didn’t know if it was referring to sheep or to (human) placentas. I guess I should have Baidued it a bit, but I forgot…
The next question now is: do people really go to Switzerland for that? And if they do, do they organize it through an unbranded sms junk message like this? Don’t know, but I have seen more weird things than this in China.
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worried about sheepish side effects, this one might be better ;P
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Placenta_ad_in_Hong_Kong.jpg
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Julen Madariaga Reply:
March 31st, 2010 at 5:18 pm
Good one George. I don’t know what is more stupid, to use human placenta/sheep foetus, or to book a trip to Switzerland through a shady SMS message that has scam written all over it.
I guess the latter, as the sheep thing seems to have many followers. I say this because I have received mail from an American gentleman explaining that sheep foetus had miraculous effects on him, especially when injected in his buttocks. I kid you not.
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I just got this the other day:
‘创新’公司可制作和对方同号手机号码,可接听对方是商业竞争和婚外恋的好帮手,先测试后付款。请电:X
“A good help for those with extramarital affairs.” I have to save that sometimes China’s speed of development is too fast even for me.
I’m not sure you get these messages because you handed out your name card. I just got a new phone number last year, and I’m already getting tons of these.
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Part of the message was lost (interpreted as HTML?). After 可接听 it should read “《通话*信息》”
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Wukailong, that is very similar to the one I got last year with the special card. I get loads of this kind, perhaps more than once a week on average, which proves that it works (I mean, the scam works, not the spying system of course).
Your message is funny because it suggests possible uses of the system, like spying on the competition or on your extramarital affair, LOL.
BTW, some of the best sms I have seen are the ones directed to corrupt officials, for example:
If the ratio of 贪官 (corrupt officers) is as high as I suppose, then that message has good chances to get you rich
I cannot find it now but I will cover it here when I receive it again.
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